What to Say (and Not Say) When Helping a Child with Reading Difficulties

Watching your child struggle with reading can tug at your heart. As online reading specialists who work with children in grades K–5, we know that frustration is a common part of the journey—especially for kids with Dyslexia, ADHD, processing challenges, or those who are just slightly behind in their reading development.

When a child hits a wall during reading time, your response matters. The words you choose can either build their confidence or reinforce the idea that they “just can’t read.”

Let’s break down what to avoid and what to try instead when you're trying to help a child with reading difficulties.

What Not to Say When Your Child Is Struggling to Read

Even with the best intentions, some common phrases can do more harm than good. Here are a few to steer clear of:

• “Just sound it out.” This might seem helpful, but for many children—especially those with Dyslexia or processing issues—sounding out doesn’t always work. It can feel like being told to run before they know how to walk.

• Constant corrections. Over-correcting every mistake can quickly drain a child’s confidence. If every word is wrong, what’s the point in trying?

• “You already learned this.” Memory and retention can be inconsistent for struggling readers. Repetition is often necessary, and shame should never be part of the process.

What to Say Instead: Calming, Encouraging Phrases

Your words can be powerful tools to guide and support your child. Try these instead:

• “Let’s try it together.” This simple phrase offers partnership instead of pressure. It shows them they’re not alone.

• “Take your time.” Processing language takes longer for some kids. Giving them permission to slow down relieves anxiety.

• “You’re working hard on this—I can see that.” Praise the effort, not just the outcome. Effort-focused feedback encourages persistence.

• “It’s okay to make mistakes. Mistakes help us learn.” This reinforces a growth mindset and normalizes struggle as part of the learning process.

Calming Strategies for Reading Time

Frustration can escalate quickly when helping a child with reading difficulties. Here are a few tools to help your child self-regulate:

• Deep breathing together before starting.

• Use a visual timer to set short, manageable reading chunks.

• Let them choose the reading spot—a cozy corner or a special chair can make a big difference.

• Try reading aloud together to reduce the pressure of decoding every word.

Build a Supportive Reading Routine

Structure helps kids feel safe. Create a predictable, positive reading routine at home:

• Stick to the same time each day. After dinner? Before bed? Pick a time that works for your family.

• Start with success. Let your child read a favorite (and easy) book first to boost confidence.

• Keep sessions short and sweet. 10–15 minutes of focused reading can be more effective than pushing through 30 minutes of stress.

Helping a Child With Reading Difficulties Starts With Connection

Your child’s reading journey won’t look like anyone else’s—and that’s okay. What matters most is that they feel supported, encouraged, and never alone in the process.

If your child is struggling to read and you’re not sure why, we can help. Whether it’s Dyslexia, ADHD, or simply a gap in foundational skills, our team specializes in working with K–5 students to close that gap—so they can succeed in school and in life.

Need help creating a custom reading plan for your child? We offer personalized online support for children who are struggling to learn to read. Schedule a call to learn more about how we can help!

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